Seven Days in Coffin

Director: ?
Starring: Surachai SaengArkard, Khemmasorn Nookaaw, Panida Worrabutr
Running Time: 97 minutes
Year: 2003

O.k. so I bit again on a low budget Thai horror and the taste was not pleasant. This is so monotonously bland that I almost wanted to climb into the coffin and take a long sleep. The acting is awful, the music is annoying and the film would have felt stretched at thirty minutes. At ninety-seven minutes it felt like it would never end though oddly some of the filler was the best part of the film. This is your basic the dead come back for revenge motif, but never has a ghost done it in such a lackluster and leisurely manner. The ghost union should object to this type of tedious portrayal of themselves. Have a work ethic damn it - kill people, don't just loiter about!

Mali is dead drowned by an unknown assailant in the river. It turns out in the follow up investigation that Mali was the village pin cushion she seems to have slept with just about anything that moved while she was alive and even manages to seduce the undertaker after she is dead! She was also two months pregnant and was demanding that everyone she had slept with to take responsibility for the child none of the men were thrilled with this and thus many had a motive for killing her. Her corpse is laid out for burial rites for seven days and during this time her ghost comes and goes as it pleases. She chats with various people and promises revenge, but annoyingly keeps forgetting to tell anyone who murdered her. If she had done so it would have saved everyone a lot of trouble and a few lives as well and me from having to watch this film but some things you want to do for yourself I suppose. At one point her baby pops out and starts running after one of the suspects and it looked like this might get fun but the baby was never spotted again though there are reports that it became a DJ in a Bangkok hiphop dance club.
Now the real highlight of the film was complete filler that came out of nowhere and made no sense in the context of the film, but I was only too happy to see it by that time. The investigating cop wanders down to the river with his very large-chested girlfriend (who we had not seen previously nor ever again after this scene) and she decides for no particular reason to walk into the water thus creating the equivalent of a Thai wet sari scene but with the cop  looking bored as if he has seen this show before, she decides to take it off and take him into the barn. Wow a murky Thai nude scene still quite rare in Thai commercial film, but I have noticed an easing off of their restrictions in this regard as of late though possibly these were straight to video films and thus ducked under the very stringent censor radar. In an amusing out take at the end, the busty girl was having a heck of a hard time raising the wet shirt above the two rather large obstacles in its path and she breaks down laughing!

My rating for this film: 2.0