Kitty the Killer
      

Director:  Lee Thongkham
Year: 2023
Rating: 5.5
Country: Thailand

When a screwy Thai action film has no ladyboys in it, you know that they had a broader market in mind other than just Thailand. But it is very hard to see this playing in many multiplexes outside of Thailand. It is just not very good though it starts well and ends well - if they had only done something with that muddled middle part that seemed to drag on like a politician's speech. Thailand has had their share of professional killer films, so this is nothing new to them. I have been told that it costs about $100 to hire a hitman here. I have never had the need to test that theory and I imagine you get what you pay for.



Professional killer films are everywhere these days and female action films are sprouting up like mushrooms as well - so it certainly makes sense to make a film about female professional killers - or Kitties as they are called here. All young and deadly. they are chosen from the street children and trained. A plot point used in many of these kinds of films - but still teenage female killers has potential. But this film teeters between a few action scenes and some pretty bad comedy. Thai cinema can't help itself. If it had gone straight, it would have been so much better. And the days of Tony Jaa and Yanin "Jeeja" Wismitanant  may have passed. The main killer actress here is your basic model, singer, TV actress (her sister Pimprapa Tangprabhaporn is apparently quite famous as a singer and TV actress in Thailand.). I doubt is she has ever even broken a fingernail in her life.



So that beginning. Guardian Keng calls his killer to do a job. She is a high school student named Dina played by Ploypailin Thangprabhaporn. This is why nearly everyone in Thailand has a nickname - hers is Ploy. Ploy reminded me of a young Phoebe Cates with a strong dash of Lisa, the Thai member of Black Pink, mixed in. In other words, she is very attractive. Her job is to collect a box from Wong, who is an agent for a Japanese contract killer organization - just as Keng and Dina work for a Thai company. She goes nowhere without her instrument case and pulls out a samurai sword and gets to killing.   She takes the box to Keng but everyone wants it - including her own organization. The stealing of the box was not sanctioned.



Up to here, the film is solid - sure teenage killers as young as six might be hard to buy into but still - we have a group of female killers working for an organization and a mysterious box that everyone wants. It isn't exactly a McGuffin, but it comes close. Then the film falls down a rabbit hole - they need a new Guardian and pick some nobody out to be that guy. And train him with electric shocks, sword fighting and balancing. The electric shock is applied by the six-year-old. This goes on for the lifespan of certain animals and they could take some lessons from martial arts films to make it interesting. And then finally some more action. A little disappointing that this came from Thailand and didn't have some awesome action scenes but a girl with a sword is really all you need.