I had two options for my first night. A friend
had been able to get me a ticket to a preview of the new Ching Siu-tung
film - hopefully a return to the greatness of A Chinese Ghost Story and Swordsman
II - called An Empress and the Warriors. Another friend who is involved with
the Asian Film Awards said he could get me a ticket to that and perhaps to
the party afterwards. Tough call - the Awards last year were suppose to be
the nearest thing to death without being shot in the head but it was still
a chance to do some celebrity gawking - but I was here in Hong Kong to see
movies and so went with An Empress. To my everlasting regret. My friend told
me that Shu Qi was a presenter and was at the party. In a low cut gown. Looking
really good. Maybe my last chance ever to drool at her feet.
As to the film . . . well the fact that the three main stars are Donny Yen, Kelly Chan and Leon Lai should have been a danger sign - perhaps the three most expressionless actors in Hong Kong - all in one movie - sometimes in the same scene - time basically implodes. They live up to their reputations - Donnie looks like he is suffering from constipation the whole time - desperately in search of a laxative - Leon is so bland he should be a white Republican (is there any other kind?) with one too many meals at the local country club - but Kelly to her credit works up two expressions in the film - one a Charlene Choi shy giggly imitation and the other a poker faced gaze that she must give to her maid when her blouses are wrinkled.
There is potential here that goes sadly by the
wayside. The Yan Empire is being invaded by various kingdoms and after the
King is killed in battle an internecine struggle brews between the nefarious
nephew Wu Ba, the orphan bastard (as everyone calls him) General Muyong (Donnie
Yen) and the daughter of the King, Yan Feier (Kelly). Muyong and Feier are
allied on the side of good, but Wu Ba wants power at any cost. He hires a
band of ninja types to assassinate Feier, but after she is hit with a poison
dart she is saved by a hermit woodsman, Duan (Leon) - who has set up an elaborate
three bedroom tree house deep in the woods where he tends to lambs, keeps
bees for honey, discovers cures for illness, builds hot air balloons and is
probably working on creating the Internet. It is his Shangri-la. He professes
to be a man of peace who has forsaken war, but who has oddly boobytrapped
the entire forest with deadly devices - perhaps just in case a hottie shows
up one day being chased after by killers.
A romance blooms and a film dies - as it basically
devolves into a glossy music video of embarrassing proportions. I turned
to my friend and said "a song should break out right about now" and it does
- a duet - then they get into the balloon and sail away into the sunset.
But sadly they don't disappear forever. She has to come back for her people
and a close-up. Picture Kelly looking stern and very cute in her armour.
More women would wear armour if they looked that good. If the film had stayed
with the basic premise it could have been a solid if far from inspiring addition
to the wuxia genre - the action is well-done with feet firmly on the ground
- a big battle scene is nicely staged - some smaller more intimate fights
are fine - and a Donnie against about a thousand men fight is right out of
a Chang Cheh film - but the forays into puppy love feel like they should be
in another film - a very bad one.
Not to pile too heavily on Kelly, but the role
is really one that should have been given to a younger actress - an actress
who could have more realistically portrayed a young lady caught between blushing
youth and the need to grow up quickly to save her people. Sadly, my friend
and I tried to think of a current Hong Kong actress who would have been a
better fit but couldn't really come up with one.
My rating for this film: 5.5
I had forgotten that I had reviewed this film already and so what do you know, two for the price of one - about ten years apart but still rated a 5.5!
Seeing Kelly Chen in a film the other day put me in the mood to see her
in another movie. I am not sure why. It certainly hasn’t happened before
because I am not really a fan of hers and it probably won’t happen again.
She has been in some good movies, but it is debatable whether that was because
of her or in spite of her. She is very attractive even with those weird teeth
that I respect her for never bothering to fix to look perfect – but she is
so very placid in her acting style – like a frozen lake admired from the shoreline.
She looks great here especially decked up in her splendid armor and I have
always found women in a heavy metal helmet quite fashionable and alluring.
It should be more common.
This is a big fat sop of a historical film that is like an inverted soggy
sandwich with way too much mayonnaise added. There is so much talent behind
the camera and so much - hmmm – can’t say talent exactly but star power in
front of the camera and yet it sinks like a drowning man in cement. Directed
by the legendary Ching Siu-tung who has either directed or action choreographed
more great films than many people have seen – The Chinese Ghost Story and
Swordsman trilogies among others, James Yuen is on the script (many of those
UFO films of the 1990’s), the set designer is Kenneth Yee doing similar duties
on a ton of famous films – Peace Hotel, Viva Erotica, Once Upon a Time in
China and a bunch of the UFO films and the cinematographer Zhao Xiao- Ding
was just coming off of lensing Curse of the Golden Flower and House of Flying
Daggers. You can’t get much better than that.
But someone had the idea to have the three least charismatic actors in Hong
Kong all together in one film. Of course I am speaking of Kelly Chen, Donnie
Yen and Leon Lai. On the same screen sometimes at the same time. It has the
makings of a black hole which could swallow up the earth. Or at least sink
a film. All three of them can be palatable in the right films – Kelly in Lost
and Found, Leon in Comrades A Love Story and Donnie in – let me think – let’s
say Wing Chun for the sake of argument – but they have good actors to cover
up for them. Here they are naked in the wind. Not so much playing off each
other but colliding into one another. The three of them together could not
light a match.
But let me say this has some very good action scenes that intermittently
interrupt a love story that would embarrass a constant reader of Harlequin
romances. It is set back sometime long ago when little kingdoms were fighting
little kingdoms. The Yan Empire are the good guys in this scenario but in
a battle the King receives an arrow that pierces his body from stem to stern
but still lives. And while badly wounded he turns the responsibility of running
things to the stern looking Donnie. The King’s nephew doesn’t think much of
this and kills the king when he is weirdly all alone with an arrow sticking
out of him and then claims that he was named the next leader. Instead through
some politicking Kelly is named Empress – which pisses off the nephew even
more – and she goes through military training – all very believable so far.
Ok not even a little bit.
But when she goes out for a bath on her own in the river miles away from
anyone, assassins come for her and wound her. Fortunately for her a lonely
woodsman is around and has set up booby traps everywhere just in case a Princess
came his way. This is Leon. He of the one expression. He is a doctor, a philosopher,
an inventor, a peacenik, a beekeeper and unknown to her a magnificent warrior.
How could a girl not fall in love and want to stay and live in a tree house
and fly on his gigantic air balloon. By fly on his air balloon I mean fly
on his air balloon. But fate has another way for the poor Empress. This teenage
love come late is like a giant anchor in the film – and is a lot of the 90
minute film. All the other stuff is ok – great cinematography, fabulous sets
and I love the armor – an interesting story of a woman rising to the throne
– Donnie literally taking on an entire army to fight - but the love story
strangles it in the crib. With more betrayals, fights, political maneuvering
this could have been quite decent.