Romance of the Vampires
Director: Ricky Lau Koon-wai
Year: 1994
Rating: 5.0
This is a film I
have always been curious about ever since reading a blurb in Asian Cult Cinema,
but I have to admit up front that it was a huge disappointment. This is surprising
especially when you consider that the director, Ricky Lau, did most of the
Mr. Vampire series. This film though is far from that series both in content
and quality as it plays out more like a sex soap opera than a comic horror
film. Other than some – hmmm . . . interesting visuals dealing with
one of the actresses rather large breasts, there was little here worth hanging
on to. The vampires in this film are not your traditional HK film vampires
– but updated to be more in the Western tradition with a strong sexual bent.
Or to put it simpler, these vampires are more humping vampires than hopping
vampires!
Yau Yuet Ching and her lover Ben Lam have just arrived in HK – but as the
song goes “They only go out at night”. Usang tells Ben, who came to HK in
a glass coffin, that HK is a great place for them because HK people “like
first grade food, but see third grade films. All are fat and hot for sex.
Their blood is sweet.” When this loving couple talks about going out for dinner,
the chances are they will not need a Zagats guide to find good dining. Usang
picks up a man at a bar and leads him into an alley where after some steamy
squirming around, she gets down for the main course. There seems to be a
connection between sexual arousal and a feeding frenzy for these two vampires.
Ben Lam goes to the home of a call girl (Yuen King Tan – in a few humorous
cameos), but before he works up an appetite he sees a picture of Yuen with
another girl – Yvonne Yung Hung – who reminds him of a woman he loved in his
past. Unfortunately, as shown in a flashback he could not control his hunger
pangs one evening – but has regretted this momentary lapse (for him – for
her it was eternal) in judgement. Yvonne Yung Hung is of course a bit infamous
for her roles in such Category III classics as Chinese Torture Chamber Story
and Ancient Chinese Whorehouse. This is my first sighting of her and I must
say it’s good that she has rather lovely proportions because to put it kindly
her acting ability all resides below her neck! Here she plays a blind call
girl that is in the business only to raise money for an eye operation – but
clearly doesn’t enjoy it. Not until she meets Ben that is.
He saves her from a gang of hooligans (led by Billy Chow) and it is love
at – well I can’t say first sight can I – first touch. This causes all sorts
of dilemmas as Yau is clearly not pleased with the situation and Ben loves
Yvonne – but he knows when he gets aroused, he also gets hungry. And then
when Yvonne tells him “I wish I could live with you forever” and bares her
neck (along with a few other things), it is perhaps more temptation than even
a good vampire can withstand.
It may or may not sound interesting – but it all plays out in slow motion
and is very dull for the most part. The Category III sections have some alluring
moments, but not nearly enough to save this film from a life of eternal boredom.