Zarabanda Bing Bing Film Review

Aka - Balearic Caper

Aka - Operation Gold

On YouTube in Italian with English subtitles

During the Bond craze in the 1960s when Europe was pumping out spy films like a mother hen, the next best thing to hiring Sean Connery's brother (Operation Kid Brother) was getting actors who had appeared in Bond films. This movie has two of them and except for a brief moment or two, it didn't really help. This is pretty dreadful. A supposed madcap heist film that produces not even a giggle. Was it funnier back then I wonder? It is an ordeal now to get through like Bond tied to the table in Goldfinger. And my viewing set up didn't allow me to fast forward so I saw it all and am not a better man for it. This was actually a Spanish production as they got into the Euro-Spy game along with Italy, Germany and the other day I came across one from Greece. Sixty years later most of these are not very good but also wonderful time capsules that are fun to watch. Not this one so much though the island of Ibiza looked fabulous.

In the opening scene a scuba diver discovers a valuable scepter encrusted with jewels. As soon as he gets to shore, he is murdered by a man with a rifle. The killer picks up the package and is soon killed by a dart shooter in a wooden crate. Yes, you read that right. A crate with slits is a killing machine. But before that person can pick it up a bus of school girls shows up. The scepter is taken to Ibiza where the head of security advises the officials that the safest place to keep it is in the museum. The head is played Harold Sakata but without his deadly Sandringham headgear. Bond person number one. As soon as the news gets into the paper a few interested parties come to Ibiza to steal the scepter. Unlike most heist films, the security around it is nothing complicated - two sleepy guards. Polly (Mireille Darc), a winsome blonde, walks into the museum and going down a tunnel is able to break into the cupboard of the house next door. It isn't exactly Narnia though, but a family of loads of kids and a father. This gives her ideas though how to steal it.

Also showing up is a couple with an inventive male who is able to walk up buildings and use a laser to break into places. His female partner does little but looks lovely (Marilù Tolo). Organized crime is also interested as well as the Secret Service. One person though only wants to buy it. The filthy rich Mercedes who shows up in a yacht. She is played by close to my favorite Bond Girl, Daniela Bianchi, and in truth her few scenes in a bikini are the only reason to watch this. After From Russia with Love she appeared in a few Euro-Spy films. Throw in a few fake scepters, parties trying to rob the real one in the same night and a crate that keeps killing people and you have a . . . pretty bad movie. My usual complaint with spy parodies - I hate them. But I think Bianchi is fab - she is like a purring cat.