The story of my life. Well, at least
the fading part. A comically sweet New York City tale of a gigolo and his
pimp. At least, Woody Allen doesn't play the gigolo. Twenty years previously,
he may have wanted to. It strikes me as a little off that John Turturro writes
the script, directs the film and then takes on the role of a super stud who
rings the bell of multiple women multiple times. The whole thing reeks of
male fantasy. I mean if Turturro's character had a few flaws, then ok. But
he plays irresistible to women. But whom am I to say. But gigolo material?
The film feels at times to be very Allenesqe - Turturro either shares his
sense of humor and the absurd or Woody was standing over his shoulder as
he wrote. Many of the funnier lines could have been in one of his films.
It starts off strong, flags when it gets serious in the middle and then mounts
a nice comeback at the end.
Both Allen and Turturro are down on their
luck. Allen owns a rare bookstore where customers are rarer than the books.
And Turturro is down to two days a week working in a florist shop. Allen's
dermatologist tells him that she wants to have a ménage-a-trois but
doesn't know any man she can include. The lights go off in his head. No,
not him. But he talks Turturro into being the gigolo - 60/40 cut. But first
the dermatologist wants to test him - see what he is made of - and fuck -
it is Sharon Stone. It goes well. And well. And well. Our flower boy knows
all the tricks. The woman that Stone has in mind for the threesome is Sofia
Vergara. Ok - not too much of a male fantasy as she stands in her stiletto
high heels and says she likes it rough. Do you know what I mean? I sadly
have no clue, but he did.
It takes an even stranger turn and one that
felt so off-key when Allen talks an Orthodox Hasidic Jewish widow (Vanessa
Paradis) with six kids into visiting Turturro's apartment - he has to pretend
to be Jewish. If it was preposterous before, this takes it deeper into weird
territory. There are funny bits throughout all provided by Allen as
he falls into playing a typical Allen fast talking character. Liev Schreiber
plays the man in love with the Hasidic woman. And Bob Balaban shows up in
cameo as Allen's lawyer in a court of Orthodox elders.
